Our leaders are only human — but does that give them license to mess up?
Whether you’re talking about politicians, film and TV celebrities, or prominent sports figures, our culture thrives on putting individuals up on high pedestals so that we might “look up” to them, perhaps see them as role models, even point to them and encourage our kids to say, “Gee, Dad, I wanna be just like Joe when I grow up!” (Not sure, but I think that expression “just like Joe” was connected to New York Yankees great of the ’30s and ’40s, Joe DiMaggio.)
Maybe the recent death of former NFL Quarterback Steve McNair will pound one more nail in the lid of a coffin in which we can bury that cultural thriving. Whatever the final story is about McNair’s death, he plainly wasn’t living the heroic life we would want our children to emulate. And that only makes him one in a line of such folks we really don’t want for childhood heroes — names like former President Bill Clinton, Gov. Mark Sanford, former Sen. John Edwards, et. al. — well, pretty much “et. al.” back to the beginnings of recorded history.
I personally have a hard time understanding why fame, wealth, and power seem to cause the worst to show in so many people. But I think there must be such a connection: Fame, wealth, and power seem to 1) make people targets of those who would prey on their fame, wealth, and power, 2) cause people to think they are somehow entitled to break the rules, and, 3) make it easier to “get away with” breaking the rules. But maybe that’s just my opinion and doesn’t begin to touch on all the realities surrounding infidelity.
All I know is this: My two children grew up understanding that honesty, hard work, and integrity matter in every relationship, from employment to matrimony. I thank God (really, I do) for the way their lives’ turned out — and I thank God for the incredible wife I’ve been in love with for 42+ years. My purpose is not to condemn the Mark Sanfords and Steve McNairs of the world, but simply to cause anyone reading this to reflect on the matter of heroes.
Who are your heroes? Why?
What ‘lessons’ can we learn from Gov. Sanford’s affair?
Once again, a high-profile politician bites the dust. South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford held a press conference yesterday to confess his infidelity to his wife, and his failure to “be there” (literally) for the people of South Carolina. What can we learn from this in particular, and from the many high-profile politicians who’ve let their followers (and their pants) down in recent years?
I think the number one “lesson” we may learn from this is that powerful people need some sort of DAILY “reality check” about their own importance and their responsibilities. I truly believe, whether it’s rich people, celebrities, and/or politicians, that such folks reach a feeling that they somehow are 1) invincible, 2) untouchable by their critics, 3) way to clever to get caught, 4) entitled to special sexual/material privileges, or, 5) all of the above. They simply and clearly need to “get over themselves.”
A second very important lesson for us all is this: Human failure (shall we call it “sin” — I’m okay with that) is bipartisan. I would not dare to make cracks about Gov. Sanford’s politics, party affiliation, or any such stuff. The last 10-15 years is filled with a litany of men who were prominent Democrats and Republicans, liberals and conservatives, that have failed to keep their pants on when they should have. And there are probably thousands (yes, at least thousands) of other politicians and people in leadership roles who simply were never caught.
But perhaps the most important lesson in Sanford’s case for us all would be this: He must accept responsibility for destroying his wife, harming his family, and harming “the other woman” and her family. I watched his June 25 press conference where he revealed his infidelity. I also read the published email excerpts of emails he had sent to his mistress nearly a year ago. I came away just a little puzzled at his mixed message. On the one hand he confessed and called his actions “sin” by his own admission. On the other hand, he did not express, I thought, true repentance, leaving a sort of “affairs of the heart that we just can’t help ourselves with” attitude when he left the podium.
It is my prayer and my wish for Gov. Sanford and his family and all involved that he DOES work through this and resolve it in a manner that’s least harmful to all parties involved, especially his children and his mistress’s children. When adults destroy marriage and family relationships, it’s always the children who get dumped on the worst.
Oh, and then there’s the little matter of Sanford’s offense(s) against the people of South Carolina. He truly needs, in my opinion, to step down as governor. The people of South Carolina didn’t offer the governorship for sale in some fashion — they elected him governor and he accepted the responsibilities of that position. Somehow “following your heart” has no place in overseeing responsible governing of the state. He literally disappeared for several days. Had their been a state emergency requiring their governor, the folks in South Carolina wouldn’t even have known they didn’t HAVE a governor until it may have been too late.